Pagan parenting

NachtEngel · 02-18-2007, 09:33 AM

As many of you know my 3 year old son lives with me and my parent. My mother is very big on having prayer at dinner but she knows I don't believe in what she does so she does not try and get me to do the same. She does try to make my son do it and he has started yelling say grace at the table. I don't know what to do. It would be wrong for me to pretend but its just so weird. A few times he has refused to pray because I don't and my mother get very upset. So, since my mom is pushing religion on him what should I do? I have no clue how to explain this to a three year old. When he gets older it might even be worse. He is in a Christian pre-school and will be going to a Christian school. I don't want him to end up hating me but I am not sure if he will be able to understand that not everyone believes in the same thing.

**Nøz** · 02-18-2007, 09:36 AM

Why is he going to a Christian school?
Wouldn't it be better to send him to a public school where religion wont be pushed upon the child.
At least giving your son a chance to grow up and chose for himself what to believe in.
Also you can show him both ways but it would confuse the hell out of him at such a young age.

NachtEngel · 02-18-2007, 09:45 AM

The public school that he would be going here is very trashy. I think he is better off in a private school. Although, since my parents have legal custody of him I don't really have a say in the matter of what school he will go to.

I guess originally I was thinking even if he went to a Christian school I would be the one to teach him that it is not right to judge people based on their beliefs. Now that hes getting a bit older reality has finally struck me and I have come to realize that with my parents involved I can't be sure how he will react to me not being a Christian as well. I would imagine at that age if so many people are pushing it he won't even be able to grasp the concept that no one can be sure of the truth.

**Nøz** · 02-18-2007, 10:02 AM

He wont...
Also with the Christian mind set he wont see past that when they are telling him what to believe in..
The only thing you can do is teach him both and explan it as they teach him.
For now they will only teach him about Jesus untill hes around 14 when they teach him about the other stories in the Bible.
Just review it with him tell him what you believe because he will ask you why you dont believe like grandma and grandpa do.

NachtEngel · 02-18-2007, 10:10 AM

I will tell him what I believe when he ask but I am in no way going to push my own beliefs on him. My mother seems to have this mind set that kids need religion. I had this talk with her and we still disagree. I like to call what they are doing "The Santa clause treatment". They are going to try and make him believe something is true without a doubt when in reality there is no way of proving it. I guess the best I can do right now is see how things unfold and hope he does not end up disliking me because of different beliefs.

**Nøz** · 02-18-2007, 10:19 AM

I would hope that a simple thing a religion wounldnt make a son hate his father.
But in the times we live in you can never be sure..Just be ready for when he asks you and dont tell him is beliefs are wrong (like I would do) or that might drive him away.

NachtEngel · 02-18-2007, 10:23 AM

No, I honestly don't care what he decides to believe in. The only thing I am hoping is that he will not be judgmental of others that don't follow the path he chooses.

**Nøz** · 02-18-2007, 10:25 AM

Wait and see.
Hope for the best.

02-18-2007, 11:08 AM

Actually, I think this would be the best time to start teaching him religious tolerence. As they say, young kids are impressionable. I'm not saying to go off on a rant and try to get him to believe in what you believe, but it's definately time to start teaching him to respect someone else's opinion, even if it is different than his.

**Ristaron** · 02-18-2007, 04:55 PM

Tell your mom to piss off if she insists on pushing religion, and if complications around the dinner table continue, suggest that prayer be done silently.

As for the Christian school, teach your son a nice little sentence like:
"My beliefs are not yours to mold. If I want to hear about Jesus, I will ask."

Seriously, I would get my kid to do this.
Which is probably a reason why I am not going to have children.