RE: Your responses to my "5 hours!?" thread...

[ExM@N]

I made a THREAD a while ago about how Archy and I have been experiencing awesome sex and about how there IS hope in love lives measuring up to that "crazy porn" they watch and stuff. Well, that thread died and I actually forgot about it until 5 minutes ago. I read some of the responses in there with people getting bitter and even borderline angry (and even being told "fuck you for rubbing it in") which is pretty re-god-damned-diculous. What I have to say is this:

If you don't have a great sex life, or even have one at all, then don't get all pissy at other people who DO and who would like to share. Yeah, we all know the interweb is based on sad stories of your horrible horrible life, and the nuclear weapons that Iran may be developing and other such crappities, but when you see a shred of happiness or something "good" pop up, do me a favor: don't bitch and whine about it like a bunch of little brats.

Some of the people, people I even consider "friends" stepped into that thread with punk-ass attitudes and it kinda made me sad to see that kind of reaction. If you're bitter or if you can't take someone else being happy and wanting to talk about it, then don't read or listen and go sulk in your sorrow all alone where you can't bring ME down with you.

Thanks. Bitches.

P.S. To those who could see what I typed for what it truly was, and didn't bitch and whine and complain like children, thank you, I am happy that you're happy for me and us

[Stossel]

It's a real bummer it was in the 17+ section...I dunno if I would have bitched or not, because I can empathize with both sides on this issue.

I understand you want to share your happiness, and I know you think you might be informing that "there is hope in love lives," but unless you're directly solving their problems, you're not really going to help the lovesick. In fact, it really just comes off as boasting, no matter what your intention. It's something they don't have...something I don't have, which is why I can identify with them.

But, I was outwardly happy once upon a time. I liked to shout that I was happy, no matter who could hear, and I remember not caring about the effects it had on others, putting it on them to deal with it. To Opu, Synith, and whoever else attacked Ex for sharing/boasting, it really is unfair that you ask Ex to bottle such happiness, bringing him down in the process. He's got a lot of good things going for him, and it's damn hard to keep that inside, akin to how it might be to keep your bad feelings inside. Just let him be, and move on.

I don't know if anyone suggested this to you, Ex, but it might be wise to use the blogs for that sort of thread. I always treated my expressions of happiness as something outwardly radiant, not something to respond to. If you really did want it responded to, the thread idea was fine, but keep in mind people will read it however they want, and they won't all be happy. That's what a thread is for. I don't know if you've started using blogs since then; I don't really pay attention to any blog beside my own. Call me selfish.

Anyway, there's my worthless mediation of the night. Ignore it, like I know you will.

[Nøz]

Haha,
Well this is fucking awesome.

[Stossel]

Originally Posted by Nøz

Haha,
Well this is fucking awesome.

That too.

[ExM@N]

I get where you're coming from, Stoss, but what about everyone elses "OMG IM SO HORRIBLE AT LIFE" threads? And their myspace status updates of being a failure at this or that? Or even their blogs of how much fail is in their life? When I see it, I do what they should do in the event that they see something they don't want to see; I turn my head away and don't say anything. Or, it's more like I'll ask them what's wrong and try to help and all I get is this "well you can't help me" kind of answer. So what the hell?

The thread didn't come off as boasting at all. A few people were actually able to see it for what it was, which I was thankful for. And shit, if people can't deal with a thread about someone having something that they don't, well then, they might as well just shut themselves away for life seeing as to how that's LIFE in the first place! You can never have what someone else has, and there's always someone out there that's bigger and better than you tenfold. I don't sit there and cry about it.

It reminds me of the "show yourself" thread where Courtney was posting pics of her and her boyfriend. Jealous assfucks ran all over the pics and it was just ridiculous. I swear, people can't just be happy for someone. Or at least not say anything at all if they're gonna cry about it.

[Stossel]

Originally Posted by ExM@N

I get where you're coming from, Stoss, but what about everyone elses "OMG IM SO HORRIBLE AT LIFE" threads? And their myspace status updates of being a failure at this or that? Or even their blogs of how much fail is in their life? When I see it, I do what they should do in the event that they see something they don't want to see; I turn my head away and don't say anything. Or, it's more like I'll ask them what's wrong and try to help and all I get is this "well you can't help me" kind of answer. So what the hell?

I applaud you for trying to help, even though they may not. So, you do your best to not instigate with them...or, I should actually say, do what they do to your happy outbursts. I guess all I can say to you is that you don't ever return the favor to them; that is, try to bring them up to your level, I suppose. They won't get happy with your help, obviously, and they perhaps they won't stop flooding your threads with their own problems. That's just something they'll need to learn, or deal with. In the meantime I guess you've just gotta keep ignoring what they say. Unfair as hell? Of course.

The thread didn't come off as boasting at all. A few people were actually able to see it for what it was, which I was thankful for. And shit, if people can't deal with a thread about someone having something that they don't, well then, they might as well just shut themselves away for life seeing as to how that's LIFE in the first place! You can never have what someone else has, and there's always someone out there that's bigger and better than you tenfold. I don't sit there and cry about it.

Ah, yes, but it's hard to bear when you don't have any manifestation of love (or you don't think you do). Thus, complaining rises. I do my share of it, to be quite honest, but I try not to. Know that no matter what they say, they do have to deal with it, and by complaining they are dealing with life in their own way. And, apparently, it did come of as boasting to some. Not to you, but to some it did.

That was a pretty bullshit rebuttal, if I do say so myself, but give me a break. It's 3 AM.

It reminds me of the "show yourself" thread where Courtney was posting pics of her and her boyfriend. Jealous assfucks ran all over the pics and it was just ridiculous. I swear, people can't just be happy for someone. Or at least not say anything at all if they're gonna cry about it.

Ah, yes, that. It's really hard to be happy for someone when you're barely happy yourself. And I'm trying, as hard as I can, to not say anything in that instance. But it's also quite hard to keep your feelings back if you're usually an open person. Also, if you're thinking of the "walking stereotype" comment, I don't really see that as rooted in jealousy. But that's me, and I'm not really solving anything by rationalizing myself in odd directions and circles.

So I'm going to stop now.

[ExM@N]

The "walking sterotype" thing was the perfect example. Perhaps not of jealousy, per sey, but possible anger, and was un-needed either way. Your statements are fair enough, I suppose. I could do one of three things, though in the event I see an "OMGIRFAIL" thread:

1.) Enter with sympathy and get the "you can't help me" treatment.

2.) Enter with anger and tell them to "shut the fuck up and stop whining, because, even though some things are going well for me, life is still fucked for us all" and piss them off being totally inconsiderate (like they've done to me)

or

3.) Ignore it.

And they can enter a "OMGIRHAPPY" thread (like mine) and do one of three things:

1.) Enter with commiseration and tell me that they're happy for me (even if they're 'jealous' or whatever the case.

2.) Enter with anger and tell me to "shut the fuck up and stop boasting" (or, cough, "fuck you", like someone actually DID tell me)

or

3.) Ignore it.

Out of the 3 choices listed in each situation, only two of them would be the right thing to do. Number 2 is the fucked up, wrong thing to do in EITHER case, which is why I would never do it to them. Now, don't get me wrong, choice number two MAY be the truth in some cases, but even so, people (especially your friends) should be a little more considerate and if they have nothing good to say, choose number 3; IGNORE!

They wouldn't like it if I came to their thread/blog/whatever and said "shut the fuck up and deal with it" JUST THE SAME that I wouldn't appreciate them entering my thread/blog/whatever saying "shut the fuck up because I'm not happy". It goes both ways. Most of the people who complained in my thread are the same one's who complain about being so sad, but I don't go around telling them to shut the fuck up abut it. I either ignore it or try to sympathize the best I can.

But, nope, life isn't fair. You can NEVER get the same respect that you give.

[Stossel]

Then, I suppose the test is to not sink to response 2, for your own good. I respect you for not doing that, though, so know you've got at least one fan over here. And hopefully this exchange changes some minds, or at least how they react. Because I really don't see them being changed any other way, than through themselves.

Also,

Originally Posted by ExM@N

But, nope, life isn't fair. You can NEVER get the same respect that you give.

Quoted for endless, endless, eternal goddamn truth.

[ExM@N]

Originally Posted by Stossel

Then, I suppose the test is to not sink to response 2, for your own good. I respect you for not doing that, though, so know you've got at least one fan over here. And hopefully this exchange changes some minds, or at least how they react. Because I really don't see them being changed any other way, than through themselves.

Also,


Quoted for endless, endless, eternal goddamn truth.

Indeed, in-motherfucking-deed.

Alright well I guess I feel a little better about this now. We'll have to see how it goes from now on I suppose.

EDIT: Anywho, I'm done with this thread, just wanted to get my thoughts out and potential help on the situation, and Stossel sufficed and has my gratitude.

I'm done here, and it can be deleted/closed/whatevah

[Chase_the_Bass]

Are you two done jerking each other off?

Let's make it a triangle.