Polyamory

NachtEngel · #1 (**permalink**) 12-18-2007, 02:32 PM

I think this needs a topic of its own since it was being constantly brought up in another one. What are your opinions on polyamory?

I know I could never do it but I have respect for anyone that can. I think it takes a strong person to be able to love more than one person if they were brought up in a monogamous atmosphere. It would mean breaking away from some of the emotions and feelings you have learned from a young age. You would have to be able to not feel like you are not being cheated and are still good enough for the other person. People that are really Polyamorous don't use it as an excuse to screw around with multiple people. They still have trust and talk things out in a relationship. They make agreements and have an understanding but still love each other. I think it is a beautiful thing to be able to break free from the ideas and emotions that have been drilled into you and be able to have love for more than one person. Love can be a beautiful thing and to share it without feeling betrayed and getting hurt could be amazing.

Static · 12-18-2007, 03:12 PM

I think it's a bad idea and it'll eventually lead to problems down the road, seeing as in one of those relationships, one person is generally more into it than the other, which causes problems...

NachtEngel · 12-18-2007, 03:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Static

I think it's a bad idea and it'll eventually lead to problems down the road, seeing as in one of those relationships, one person is generally more into it than the other, which causes problems...

Then how do you explain the people that it has worked for? Just because you were brought up to believe you can only love one person does not mean it's the same for everyone. I think some people can break free from that standard which for the most part I believe was only created because of certain religious beliefs.

Don't get me wrong, I like just having one person. I think for some loving one person isn't enough and if two people feel the same way and understand that then it would be possible to have a couple intimate relationships.

little miss sun · 12-18-2007, 03:37 PM

what works for other people might not work for me. I don't believe I or my fiance could have multiple intimate relationships and not get jealous. But hey if it works for you, then I'll support ya.

NachtEngel · 12-18-2007, 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by little miss sun

what works for other people might not work for me. I don't believe I or my fiance could have multiple intimate relationships and not get jealous. But hey if it works for you, then I'll support ya.

Yeah, I am very open minded about the concept but know a lot of people aren't. A good amount of people can't accept the idea that love could be shared for certain people and think it would fail. Some people would even get angry at the idea that people would have more than one intimate relationship.

12-18-2007, 04:43 PM

I guess I'm just a closed minded mongymist because if my boyfriend ever came to me and said he wanted more than one girlfriend, I would kick him in the nuts so hard he would have to open his mouth to take a pee.
Sorry but I do see polymorous as nothing more than an excuse to have more than one sex partner at the same time.

NachtEngel · 12-18-2007, 04:55 PM

Thats what you call swinging.

Not polyamory.

I also didn't say you were closed minded for not being with more than one person. You are however closed minded for not accepting that it is possible for some people. Polyamory is an actual relationship. If it was an excuse to have sex then the other person would not have a say in what you do. I am sure some people only have sex with the person they are in the closest relationship with. Others may just set limitations. It depends on how they both feel and takes a lot more work than a mundane relationship. You should do a little more research before you make such ignorant assumptions about people.

little miss sun · 12-18-2007, 05:03 PM

Lol, swinging.

I'm open minded. That's all. I wouldn't practice. But I'm open minded. I'm not closeminded even though that's how I was raised as a Southern Baptist. Hell nothing surprises me anymore.

NachtEngel · 12-18-2007, 05:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by little miss sun

Lol, swinging.

I'm open minded. That's all. I wouldn't practice. But I'm open minded. I'm not closeminded even though that's how I was raised as a Southern Baptist. Hell nothing surprises me anymore.

Same here, except for the southern baptist part.

12-18-2007, 05:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NachtEngel

Thats what you call swinging.

Not polyamory.

I also didn't say you were closed minded for not being with more than one person. You are however closed minded for not accepting that it is possible for some people. Polyamory is an actual relationship. If it was an excuse to have sex then the other person would not have a say in what you do. I am sure some people only have sex with the person they are in the closest relationship with. Others may just set limitations. It depends on how they both feel and takes a lot more work than a mundane relationship. You should do a little more research before you make such ignorant assumptions about people.

Sorry but no matter how you try to sugar coat it, I find it nasty. The assertion that you are "in love" with several different people just sounds like somebody fooling themselves into thinking they do something beyond "swinging". That tells me such people probably have feelings of guilt about it and as a result invent these candy coated meanings to make themselves feel better about it.