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12-12-2007, 03:06 AM
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Member
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Posts: 452
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Seriously fucked up
Hey, so its been a while since I've posted blah blah blah, sorry about that. Anyway, here's the deal: I'm still in Japan and have come to know the place I'm staying (Hikone, in Shiga prefecture) pretty well, and so, among other things, I've made pretty good friends with some bar tenders around here. So last night, I'm at one of the guys I know's bar drinking with a bunch of friends and everyone gets plastered. My one friend (we'll call her X for sake of anonymity) gets especially drunk. I just heard from another friend, Aaron, that the bar tender gave X a ride home last night but instead of immediately dropping her off he took her to the beach and, irregardless of him being married with two kids, started trying to make out with her, but she didn't want to. Apparently, after this he forcefully took her to the bathroom nearby and raped her.
She doesn't want anyone to know, and perhaps understandably, but this is straight up rape and it needs to be addressed. Question is, do I respect her wishes and keep quiet, which I really don't want to do, or do I breach her trust in me and tell someone about it. I feel that the latter is the best choice, but this is a super fucking heavy situation and I'm really unsure of how to act.
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12-12-2007, 05:27 AM
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#2 (permalink)
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Guest
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Tell someone. She'll be safer in the long run, because if she just lets it go he'll do it again.
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12-12-2007, 05:34 AM
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#3 (permalink)
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Mr. EFG
Posts: 14,577
Join: Feb 2007
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I would discuss it with her first, try to make her understand that someone needs to be told, even if it's you telling some of her other friends to confront the guy. Though he shouldn't be allowed to get away with something like this, she might feel sensitive about this, or afraid, or that she'll be viewed differently by others.
__________________
"Everyone is stupid except me."
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Originally Posted by [ Jew Blaster ]
I can handle you...and your sexy parties.
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"All the whores and politicians will look up and shout 'Save us!' And I'll look down, and whisper 'no.'" -- Rorschach
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12-12-2007, 05:58 AM
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#4 (permalink)
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Member
Posts: 452
Join: May 2007
Location: Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
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Aaron and I talked it over with her and while she's pretty sensitive about the topic I think we managed to convince her that the best thing to do is to at least start off by telling the director of our program and see where it goes from there. The main problem I see with this situation, though, is that she is leaving for America in 2 days and I wonder what kind of proceedings can follow with such little time.
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12-12-2007, 06:19 AM
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#5 (permalink)
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Mr. EFG
Posts: 14,577
Join: Feb 2007
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Probably not much, but, this guy needs to be looked in to, because if he gets away with it, he'll most likely do it again.
__________________
"Everyone is stupid except me."
Quote:
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Originally Posted by [ Jew Blaster ]
I can handle you...and your sexy parties.
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"All the whores and politicians will look up and shout 'Save us!' And I'll look down, and whisper 'no.'" -- Rorschach
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12-12-2007, 06:36 AM
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#6 (permalink)
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NegaChrist
Posts: 9,625
Join: Oct 2006
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tyrannosaurusjr
Hey, so its been a while since I've posted blah blah blah, sorry about that. Anyway, here's the deal: I'm still in Japan and have come to know the place I'm staying (Hikone, in Shiga prefecture) pretty well, and so, among other things, I've made pretty good friends with some bar tenders around here. So last night, I'm at one of the guys I know's bar drinking with a bunch of friends and everyone gets plastered. My one friend (we'll call her X for sake of anonymity) gets especially drunk. I just heard from another friend, Aaron, that the bar tender gave X a ride home last night but instead of immediately dropping her off he took her to the beach and, irregardless of him being married with two kids, started trying to make out with her, but she didn't want to. Apparently, after this he forcefully took her to the bathroom nearby and raped her.
She doesn't want anyone to know, and perhaps understandably, but this is straight up rape and it needs to be addressed. Question is, do I respect her wishes and keep quiet, which I really don't want to do, or do I breach her trust in me and tell someone about it. I feel that the latter is the best choice, but this is a super fucking heavy situation and I'm really unsure of how to act.
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You go to the authorities right now! They will keep it a secret, trust me. If she doesn't get a rape kit done within 72 hours of that happening, then the guy will most likely get away with it anyway. She needs evidence, she needs to give a statement and let them know. Now.
I know she doesn't want to talk about the details and especially with a cop who she doesn't know or whatever. It is going to be hard to talk about.
They are going to assume that she is lying because a lot of women lie about things even as serious as this, so tell her to just keep a level head.
When she goes through this, I hope she realizes that what she is doing is a good thing and she needs to put scum like this in jail or he can do it to someone else.
Just please tell her to go to the police.
...and if she doesn't, you do it for her. That will give her the extra push to do what she needs to do. It's a touchy subject. She needs all of the support she can get and trust me, she might be mad at you at first but she will thank you in the long run.
__________________
This world is full of fake titties and real assholes.
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12-12-2007, 06:54 AM
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#7 (permalink)
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Member
Posts: 452
Join: May 2007
Location: Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
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We just had a meeting with the director and she's going to hit the hospital early tmr morning. As for her decision on whether or not to report him, she may or may not be turning towards it: Aaron and I have stated our opinions on it (to report him), and the director also desires it, but she's yet to make up her mind.
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12-12-2007, 06:56 AM
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#8 (permalink)
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Mr. EFG
Posts: 14,577
Join: Feb 2007
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She needs to, not only for herself, but to help protect others.
__________________
"Everyone is stupid except me."
Quote:
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Originally Posted by [ Jew Blaster ]
I can handle you...and your sexy parties.
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"All the whores and politicians will look up and shout 'Save us!' And I'll look down, and whisper 'no.'" -- Rorschach
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12-12-2007, 07:03 AM
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#9 (permalink)
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NegaChrist
Posts: 9,625
Join: Oct 2006
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Exactly. If she does this, he can't hurt anyone anymore.
She needs to go to the hospital ASAP and get a rape kit done. I am not kidding.
__________________
This world is full of fake titties and real assholes.
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12-12-2007, 07:21 AM
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#10 (permalink)
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Mr. EFG
Posts: 14,577
Join: Feb 2007
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Especially if it's an "almost rape" or however you described it...do mean he molested her or he actually...you know...gained entry or however you want to put it?
__________________
"Everyone is stupid except me."
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by [ Jew Blaster ]
I can handle you...and your sexy parties.
|
"All the whores and politicians will look up and shout 'Save us!' And I'll look down, and whisper 'no.'" -- Rorschach
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