I need advice asap

02-14-2007, 05:20 PM

My bf and I met online almost 3yrs ago my parents disapproved of me meeting someone online and told me to never talk to him again i didnt live at home i was out on my own but i contunied to talk with him when my parnets would ask if i was still talking to him i would say no. Last jan he came down here and we moved in togather the first time we met my parents do not approve of that lifestyle and discourged the relationship but we kept living togather we have now decided to get married but my parents refuse to help with the wedding expenses and since we are having the wedding on the beach alot of my family is not planning on being there. Im very sad about all of this since i was a young girl ive always dreamed of a big wedding with family and friends but it seems my family doesnt want to be apart of my big day. my bf is a great guy hes been here for me when no1 else has been and he works so hard to make sure we have everything we need and somethings we want. We are very close hes like my best friend i couldnt imagine life without him. I love him and he loves me but my family refuses to except him or our lifestyle it doesnt matter how much we try to please them it never seems to be enough. Any advice what to do???

EH.... · 02-14-2007, 05:26 PM

hmm that is a pickle indeed ummm....could there be another reason of why they wouldnt like him? I mean your out on your own now he hasn't tried to kill you or anything,your relationship seems to be a happy one, so why in the world wouldnt they approve of him do you seem unhappy to them?

**Kelley** · 02-14-2007, 05:29 PM

Well it may be tough, but screw your family if they don't see how much you care for each other.

Elope or something, move away and cut yourself of ties with your family until they realize their mistake in not supporting you.

I dunno...maybe that's a bit harsh.

02-14-2007, 05:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EH....

hmm that is a pickle indeed ummm....could there be another reason of why they wouldnt like him? I mean your out on your own now he hasn't tried to kill you or anything,your relationship seems to be a happy one, so why in the world wouldnt they approve of him do you seem unhappy to them?

No we are very happy togather around them even when im around my family alone. Hes never done anything to hurt me or my family, hes never gave them ny reason not to like him except he wasnt there ideal son in-law.

02-14-2007, 05:40 PM

There's only so much you can let your family decide for you, and whether or not you can marry the person you love is not one of them. You need to sit them down and explain to them (in a mature manner) that you love him and he loves you and you want to spend the rest of your lives together. And then if they still don't get it, tell them bluntly to fuck off.

02-20-2007, 12:07 AM

My sister met her last husband online and he is great. If you two are happy your family should be happy for you.

You sit and talk with them about what exactly their problem is and then all of you should sit down and talk about the situation. Maybe make it clear to them that you guys are getting together no matter what they have to say so they might as well enjoy the wedding.

Static · 02-20-2007, 08:33 AM

i'm guessing your parents are on the conservative side, but dude it's the 21st century and times have changed a lot since they were kids. I say, if you love the guy and he loves you, then you should do what you want to do, and not worry about what your family has to say about it, and at the wedding just befriend all of his family members, I'm sure they would take you in with open arms and it would be just as cool as having your family there.

**SARS-expl0ted** · 02-20-2007, 08:39 AM

Well, you cannot make your parents go. Just tell them how you feel and that they are childish.
Tell them that if they don't want to be a part of your big day you won't and cannot make them but you would really want them to be there.
They should pull through. If not, then they would have missed their child's wedding && have to live with that.

Good luck to you guys.

**Opunaya** · 02-20-2007, 09:25 AM

Well, they don't need to make you're decisions for you. If you're not living with them, and supporting yourself, then forget them. Parents these days don't realize how hard it is to meet someone, and that not everyone on the internet is a psychotic rapist. They'll either get over it, or they won't, they seem to be acting very childish in this situation.

ohsoindie · 02-20-2007, 09:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SARS-expl0ted

Well, you cannot make your parents go. Just tell them how you feel and that they are childish.

This is what I was going to say. Tell them that refusing to help with/attend the wedding certainly isn't going to stop you from getting married. Tell them you're happy, and their snooty disapproval isn't going to change that. Their refusal to even TRY to accept your boyfriend strikes me as very childish. Like a kid who won't eat his broccoli.