**blushes** Thank you!
I'm told by my professor that it is too narrative and that I need a bit more description, but I can't bring myself to change much on the poem itself.
**sighs**
maybe something in this stanza?
"we change into dry clothes
the best off the k mart clearance rack
artfully, creatively, and delightfully stylish
we head to the concert, sing our throats raw
until our heads burn with scratchy notes
and screechy fans
I see my admiree,
who is ignorant of such affection,
he brushes his lips against my hand"
It is supposed to be in the same theme as Frank O'Hara's "The Day Lady Died."
Any help is welcome!